OT: waaaaaaay OT....

[ike]

so sorry sir,

as for the sex and dating.... i didnt know that. somebody told me it was just for anything u wanted


ahah sory


i'll try to keep it dirty next time!



-ike

[skipuppy]

the stick peope (previous thread page) are definitely sex appropriate

[skipuppy]

divorce appropriate

[ike]

No need for a jack...

[Michelle]

See, now we are back on topic!

[wavechaser]

...to clarify "OT" (off topic) - if you have something outside the general forum, i.e. not snowboard related, just put "OT" in front of your post title. You'll see it on several threads here and there. It's like putting "WTB" in front of a classifieds post for "Want To Buy".

[Aisling]

No need for a jack...

that can't possibly be a real human being right?

[ike]

pamela anderson?

[skipuppy]

Smart Ass Answer #5: A flight attendant was stationed at the departure gate to check tickets. As a man approached, she extended her hand for the ticket, instead he opened his trench coat and flashed her.
Without missing a beat....she said, "Sorry, Sir, I need to see your ticket, not your stub."

Smart Ass Answer #4: A lady was shopping for a turkey at the grocery store, but she couldn't find one big enough for her family. She asked a stock boy, "Do these turkeys get any bigger?"
The stock boy replied," No ma'am, they're dead."

Smart Ass Answer #3: The cop got out of his car and the kid who was stopped for speeding rolled down his window. "I've been waiting for you all day," the cop
said.
The kid replied, "Yeah, well I got here as fast as I could."
When the cop finally stopped laughing, he sent the kid on his way without a ticket.

Smart Ass Answer #2: A truck driver was driving along on the freeway. A sign comes up that reads, "Low Bridge Ahead." Before he knows it, the bridge is right ahead of him and he gets stuck under the bridge.
Cars are backed up for miles.
Finally, a police car comes up. The cop gets out of his car and walks up to the truck driver, puts his hands on his hips and says, "Got stuck, huh?"
The truck driver says, "No, I was delivering this bridge and ran out of gas."

AND NOW........FOR THE BEST ..#1 SMART ASS ANSWER OF THE YEAR 2005...

A college teacher reminds her class of tomorrow's final exam.
"Now class, I won't tolerate any excuses for you not being here tomorrow. I might consider a nuclear attack or a serious personal injury or illness, or a death in your immediate family, but that's it, no other excuses whatsoever!"
A smart ass guy in the back of the room raised his hand and asked, "What would you say if tomorrow I said I was suffering from complete and utter sexual exhaustion?"
The entire class is reduced to laughter and snickering. When silence is finally restored, the teacher smiles knowingly at the student, shakes her head and sweetly says,

"Well, I guess you'd have to write the exam with your other hand."

[ike]

[QUOTE=skipuppy
"Well, I guess you'd have to write the exam with your other hand."[/QUOTE]


hahahaha

[Michelle]

Someone has a birthday coming up!!!

[Aisling]

who's that rugged mountain man? haha

[Michelle]

who's that rugged mountain man? haha

Should say who's that TAKEN rugged mountain man?

[ike]

i just thought i'd post a picture of myself:




p.s. only kidding, not me

[philfell]

Damn I told my mom not to let that photo out. I'm really ashamed of my childhood weight problem. Oh yeah, I still wear the shirt though.

[ike]

really, she gave me this one too...

[D-Sub]

Should say who's that TAKEN rugged mountain man?

ha! michelle...happy birthday to me, eh?

I guess you missed the part about me having left OR, meaning Im no longer "taken"

rugged mountain man. SO fckin cool how having a "beard" is ok in the mountains. keeps your face warmer!

[Michelle]

I guess you missed the part about me having left OR, meaning Im no longer "taken"

SWEET! Look out SES. What were we saying about the contest????

You'd have to lose the beard though... They're scratchy! I like my men clean shaven so I can see their handsome face. I always want to know what guys with beards are trying to hide.

Ok, now I've started something I'm afraid. This thread needed a boost anyway.

[Randy S.]

Michelle, for you I'd be willing to shave wherever you suggest.

[Michelle]

Tee Hee, thanks Randy.

[carvedog]

SWEET! Look out SES. What were we saying about the contest????

You'd have to lose the beard though... They're scratchy! I like my men clean shaven so I can see their handsome face. I always want to know what guys with beards are trying to hide.

For me having a beard means not having to scrape my face everyday so. Something that I hate. Not trying to hide a thing. When I do shave everyone says I look 10 years younger. Getting to the point where that is not a bad thing either and I still don't give a rats butt - don't shave unless someone is paying me to. LOL.

[philfell]

Not hiding anything here, I'm just too lazy to shave.

[johnstewart]

You'd have to lose the beard though... They're scratchy! I like my men clean shaven so I can see their handsome face. I always want to know what guys with beards are trying to hide.

This Halloween my wife and I dressed up as Pam and Jim from the Office (US). I decided I needed to shave my beard to make it authentic... she disagreed. She'd never even seen me before without a beard; it was the first time I'd shaved in many years.

When she came home to find hair in the sink, she freaked out... nearly a divorce. =)

[kjl]

Not hiding anything here, I'm just too lazy to shave.

Man, why don't you silly white guys just be asian like me? Water, swipe chin, chin, lip, lip, water; done in 5 seconds

[dantheman0177]

I honestly don't know which is worse sometimes.

AGAINST
Scraping the face definately sucks,
FOR
but I hate the itchyness after a few days.
AGAINST
Great to prevent getting sunburned (snow, beach, wherever),
FOR
but I went for a swim this morning and now I have stubble rash on my shoulder from turning my head to breathe.

I'm sure there are plenty of others I could think of if I wasn't so tired from early morning training.

[dantheman0177]

SWEET! Look out SES. What were we saying about the contest????

See Michelle, I TOLD you there would be plenty of potential contestants!

[D-Sub]

Man, why don't you silly white guys just be asian like me? Water, swipe chin, chin, lip, lip, water; done in 5 seconds

and then we can butcher the english language, too!
I honestly wouldnt mind having to shave, but...the beard stays...Im pretty ugly without it...so yeah, Im hiding something. no cleft palate, acne, nothin like that, just a funny mug.

another con regarding beards though:

icicles! heh. Ive had some pretty bad snow buildup before, and it HURTS to get off! just gotta let it melt

[D-Sub]

See Michelle, I TOLD you there would be plenty of potential contestants!

what contest?

[kjl]

and then we can butcher the english language, too!

HURRY UP THE CAKES!!!!

[Randy S.]

Man, why don't you silly white guys just be asian like me? Water, swipe chin, chin, lip, lip, water; done in 5 seconds

Hehe. Makes me think of this joke:

Fluctuations

An asian guy in San Francisco goes to the bank to change some
of his local currency into dollars.

He asks what the exchange rate is and the teller says "20,000 to the dollar," so he goes ahead and changes some money.

The next day he needs some more dollars and goes back to the bank.
This time the teller says "20,800 to the dollar"

The asian guy says "What's going on? Yesterday it was only 20,000
and now today it's 20,800???"

The teller says "Fluctuations"

The asian guy replies "Well **** you caucasians too then!"


Ken, so I guess you don't have much use for the Razorba Back Hair Shaver eh?

Pic: